After a day like today, my brain is fried. perhaps scrambled and very possibly even poached.
I’d like to see an egg accomplish THAT.
It’s just like the Bangles said “it’s just another manic monday…wooaahhh..oooohhh. I wish it were Sunday….wooaahh…oooohhh.”
Mondays seem to get crazier and crazier and today was no exception.
Let’s see, there’s a little over six weeks left to school and Wiz Kid is under the gun, or worse, the threat of a deathly stare, stern talking to and serious grounding from Medicine Man if he doesnt’ get his two C’s and one B – up. With his 6’2″ stature and 220lbs of car-lifting-well honed-muscle, Medicine Man is downright scary to a 12 year old when he’s not happy.
That song is stuck in your head now isn’t it. “…I wish it were Sunday.. Wooaahh ooohh.. That’s my fun day…”
On top of all this most assignments for Wiz Kid now are major portfolios that carry a high grade weight to them. Any hope of seeing more A’s and B’s in his future depends on these the way I depend on chocolate and butter. Both of which I indulged in copious amounts of today.
But more on that later.
Then of course there is this huganticly ginormous audit going on at work that has all hands on deck working through crazy hours. Yes, this too shall pass. I keep telling myself that in the sincere hopes it sinks in.
Having to go back and forth between working and checking Wiz Kid’s work, my mind started feeling like a car in the hands of a teen-ager jumping and grinding the gears each time it moved from third to fourth.
But we’re not done yet. It was also Tax day. The one task I put off and off until the very last waning breath of the day. Mostly because I knew I was going to owe money to some metaphorical old man dressed in a suit of stars and stripes and goes by the name of “Uncle Sam”.
Honestly don’t you think a big harry man covered in tattoos, sporting a dangle earring made of a bullet and wearing a jacket that says “Thug!” in bold letters would be more appropriate?
This year I owe Mr Uncle Thug $1962 and he was happy to deduct it within ten minutes of my submitting.
I think we should add “Crook!” to the sleeve.
By ten am I was in dire need of not-so-nutritional therapy. I had no choice today. I went straight for the carbs. I pigged and snacked on left over double chocolate souffles and the rosemary and cracked pepper baguettes I made for dinner yesterday.
Thankfully Medicine Man kept me well stocked on tea to flush it all down and by “flush” I literally mean, big bite, gulp it down. It was about survival today.
My Tea Slave was a life saver today. He is my tea slave you know, Medicine Man? But it’s ok, he enjoys it. He makes a far better cup of tea or coffee than I do. That’s what I tell him.
By this evening my brain had gone from eggs to rubber on a plate.
If you are able to show a little age here let me take you back to the 70’s and Hershey Quick commercials. Remember Messy Marvin; the little boy who broke, smashed, messed up or trashed, everything he touched but no matter what he couldn’t make a mess of Hershey’s chocolate milk?
Well I’m not sure if that kid is still alive, and if he is then forgive me, Wiz Kid is the incarnate of Messy Marvin.
Some days I just want to wrap him in bubble wrap and tie him to his chair just to ensure a single day of “mess-freeness”.
Tonight he was late for bed.
Just about to tuck him in when Medicine Man called him back to the office to clean up his desk and school books.
Take two: On his way to the kitchen with a precious bottle of sparkling water Wiz Kid lifts it over his head screw top down. Of course the top is not on securely and “whoosh” sparkling water went all over the floor. This of course sent Wiz Kid into a fit of giggles.
I go get the mop, he goes to get a towel.
“Hurry up you crazy man, you’re standing between me and my carbs.” I tell him.
Mess cleaned up, silent prayer sent up for spilled water and Wiz is finally off to bed.
This required round two of the soufflé and I stopped counting the trips to the kitchen for bread and butter around three pm.
I have no guilt for my diet today I needed it.
As you can see I ate the whole thing.
And I would do it again.